Posted by: markfender | February 1, 2012


I wish I was good at PvP.

I’m not talking leaderboard status here. I have realistic expectations of my ability, or lack therof. But I don’t have the hand-eye coordination necessary to be good at it. Part of the reason is that I was born in the ’70s and so, when I was developing l33t computer skills, our joysticks had one button. Your modern controller has upwards of 16 buttons, plus two joysticks. Not to say I can’t use them all that well, but I don’t use them to the crazy level that I see others using them.

But there’s more than just controller-centric PvP, of course. But my mouse doesn’t seem to want to cooperate with where I want the cursor pointed either. And for some reason, WASD always confuses me (in the heat of the moment, I always end up with a finger misplaced and then end up moving weird).

But all that’s okay. Again, I’m not looking to be leading the leaderboard or anything. I would just like to help out the team. Unfortunately, this goes against my native selfishness when, in an MMO, I always make some sort of DPS person. But I’m totally okay with dying a lot if I can contribute something. That’s why Planetside was a fun game. Even if I wasn’t killing hordes of players, I was at least contributing to the war effort, from using the lawnmower-like hit box of tanks, to being a really fast hacker, I felt some sort of sense of accomplishment from a base cap going off. But partially I think this was due to the persistent world of Planetside. All your other modern PvP-type games do matches and even in those games with secondary objectives, it’s hard for one match where I do excellently to compare against the next eight in which I do horribly.

And that makes me sad, because I totally get the appeal of PvP. It’s the same maps over and over, but every match is engaging and different. But it’s also a more passing fancy with me, and so I don’t have the dedication to learn exactly which power I need to interrupt on every single other class, where the super-special weapons are buried on each map, nor what a chokepoint is. Plus, I would be extremely happy if I never had to hear anyone on XBox Live ever again. Can’t I just swear loudly to myself in the privacy of my own home without having everyone else hear it?



  1. And here I was thinking that you’d be discussing PvP, the web comic.

    The thing that has and will continue to drive me away from most online PvP is having to tolerate being called terrible things by 12-year-olds and unwashed morons. In the context of games between real-life friends, I’m happy to do so.

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